Is it possible that i could violate the restraining order i put on my ex?

he gave me a black eye n broken nose about 3 weeks ago, i got my FRO last thursday..his lawyer called me to see if i could come in and speak w. him..i did saturday...basically i still somehow care about this guy--i know i shouldnt but im human and i cant just STOP loving someone after 6 years...so his lawyer basically said that if i tell the prosecutor i dont want to speak at the other hearing (he has a criminal charge the police put on him, not me) i could really help him face serious charges...i want him to go on and have a life and be able to get a job, i DO NOT want to b w/ him again, but i dont want his future ruined..so his lawyer said he'll call me when he finds out the date and i just have to call and say im not testifying. after that happened i left my ex a few vmails..kinda angry, but yelling...basically saying "after wat u did to me and im still tryin to help u i think ontop of an apology i deserve a little bit of gratitude" i mighta called 5 times. could me calling him come back to bite me in the @$$? did i make a mistake speakin w/ his lawyer? an plz dont lecture im not saying iwant to be back with him